In this episode:

• our giant movie review of Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) in 3D, starring Shia LaBeouf and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley,
• the ridiculous length of the movie,
• the end of the shaky camera fad,
• a list of movies and TV shows Michael Bay ripped off (The Transformers, Superman, The Watchmen, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, and Jackie Chan’s Who Am I?),
• illogical Duracell battery pricing at Staples,
• our roll call of robots in the movie (Optimus Prime, Bumblebee, Ironhide, Ratchet, Sentinal Prime, Starscream, Megatron, Shockwave, Soundwave, and dozens of unnamed robots),
• Sentinal Prime’s face modeled after Sean Connery,
• Bay’s horrendous computer animated version of John F. Kennedy,
• Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) constantly screaming and crying,
• Bay’s terrible Barack Obama impersonator,
• Sam spending an hour going on job interviews,
• Leonard Nimoy as the voice of Sentinal Prime and Galvatron,
• various plot holes,
• Optimus Prime actually wondering where his trailer went in the movie,
• robots who were killed in the movie (the unnamed Scottish Autobot, Ironhide, Megatron, Starscream, the unnamed Decepticon bird, etc.),
• our welcoming of the inevitable Transformers movie reboot,
• Transformers spitting,
• Michael Bay turning Optimus Prime into a ruthless murderer,
• Peter Cullen and Frank Welker’s voice acting,
• Shia LaBeouf’s recent acting career (Eagle Eye and Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps),
• Bay’s constant use of slow motion,
• billions of dollars worth of damage in action movies with no consequences,
• hacking into objects,
• Bay’s ignorance of science,
• the lack of rules and continuity in Bay’s Transformers movies,
• What Ever Happened To? (Bugle Boy jeans, Z. Cavaricci genie pants, Zubaz, IOU sweatshirts, B.U.M. Equipment, etc.),
• Roseanne Barr’s reality show Roseanne’s Nuts on Lifetime,
• a Transformers: Dark of the Moon cameo by Scott Krinsky from Chuck,
• Bay’s completely wasted use of 3D,
• fans feeling obligated to watch bad movies,
• Glynn Turman appearing in Super 8 (2011) and Gremlins (1984),
• Sean Connery’s brother Neil Connery starring in bad movies: OK Connery (1967) and The Body Stealers (1969),
• celebrity deaths (Peter Falk and Sherwood Schwartz),
• Paul Reiser and The Paunch Stevenson Show episode 2,
• and a new stupid style (extremely short cutoff shorts with dangling pockets).

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In this episode:

• celebrity deaths (Jack LaLanne),
• WWF wrestler Dino Bravo,
• Rob’s new solo podcast The Goodrob13 Music Show,
• walking around NYC talking into a sock,
• Frank Nora’s podcast network The Overnightscape Underground,
• the Overnightscape Central podcast,
• Sean Connery refusing to participate in the 50th anniversary of James Bond,
• Zardoz (1974) starring Sean Connery,
• Will Smith’s daughter Willow Smith starring in an upcoming remake of Annie,
• The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air,
• Ashton Kutcher’s new TV show,
• the lack of talent in Hollywood today,
• The Dark Knight Rises (2012) starring Anne Hathaway as Catwoman,
• more of Stan Lee’s Twitter tweets,
• The Celebrity Apprentice season 4 starring Gary Busey and La Toya Jackson,
• Regis Philbin retiring from Live with Regis and Kelly in November 2011,
• IBM’s computer Watson competing against humans on Jeopardy!,
• Eliza Dushku updates (The Big Bang Theory, her broken finger, and her car being towed),
• the return of Bagels Plus in Belleville, NJ,
• drawing posters about Belleville in seventh grade,
• Chicken Galore,
• our nasty psychotic seventh grade math teacher (and part-time clown),
• the vice principal getting punched out,
• our typing teacher playing The Howard Stern Show and selling watches in class,
• his son’s collection of every G1 Transformer in the box,
• and a different classmate’s collection.

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In this episode:

• the iPhone 4 on Verizon,
• a stupid style (sweater parties),
• a Five Guys correction,
• The Ron and Fez Show stealing our “This Man Is not Dead” bit,
• Australian comedian James Smith talking about seppos,
• making posters in elementary school for S.E.P.P.O. disabled competitive sporting events,
• Robopocalypse vs. the Roboplastic Podcastalypse,
• counterfeit versions of The Paunch Stevenson Show,
• old toy robots we’ve never heard of (Lords of Light, Micronauts, Interchangeables, Starriors, and Robo Force),
• Greg and Rob randomly seeing each other on the bus to NYC,
• the Paunch luck (Greg getting ripped off at a Chinese buffet in Manhattan),
• celebrity deaths (Gerry Rafferty, Captain Beefheart, Blake Edwards, and Bob Feller),
• our movie review of The Other Guys (2010) staring Will Ferrell,
• Michael J. Fox’s outtakes from The Frighteners (1996),
• AVGN James Rolfe’s interview with Marty McFly voice actor AJ LoCascio,
• Michael Gambon on British TV show Top Gear telling a crazy story about Christian Slater,
• Michael Caine on British TV show Parkinson doing an impersonation of himself and Sean Connery,
• and George Martin’s horrible 1998 album In My Life featuring Robin Williams, Bobby McFerrin, Jim Carrey, Sean Connery, and Billy Connolly.

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Celebrating 5 Years of the Paunch Stevenson Show (Part I)!

In this episode:

• the old show theme song (from episode 3),
• interviewing the fake Christopher Walken (from episode 3),
• our skit about a doctor mixing lab results up (from episode 4),
• the fake Sean Connery (from episode 5),
• The Night Before Christmas Troll Read-Along Classics (from episode 7),
• Ted Danson in black face (from episode 9),
• My Chemical Romance and the singing Hobo (from episode 10),
• music from The Doors causing pain (from episode 12),
• the song “Thirteen” by Rob (from episode 13),
• duped into seeing the lousy IMAX movie Roving Mars (from episode 15),
• our hometown Belleville, NJ trivia (from episode 15),
• Paunch in Time (retreat of George Washington) (from episode 18),
• Max Wright (from episode 21),
• our 7th grade geography bee (from episode 22),
• Greg’s quest to meet the “Dush” Eliza Dushku (from episode 24),
• the Old Jingle of the Episode (Bod) (from episode 24),
• Tom Green (from episode 27),
• educational comedic film Grizzly Man (from episode 31),
• Star Wars: Louie Anderson Special Edition (from episode 34),
• our version of Sanford and Son (from episode 34),
• Jaleel White’s rumored death (from episode 36),
• the fake William Shatner sings “Shine on You Crazy Diamond” (from episode 38),
• Nicolas Cage or Dr. Phil as Superman? (from episode 39),
• Who Wants to Be a Superhero? starring Stan Lee (from episode 43),
• fake Steven Seagal sequel Under Siege 3: Space Station (from episode 61),
• Jon Voight’s zany accents and pronunciations (from episode 76),
• and our Larry David and Jeff Garlin impersonations (from episode 91).

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The one, the only, Sir Sean Connery. Don’t worry, we paid him $1 million dollars!

This is what Connery had to say….

“I’m swimming every day and I’m even trying to get the golf swing working again – but that might take a little bit longer.

“During the summer, I wasn’t in pain but I wasn’t feeling great. I came to the Edinburgh Film Festival in June then, when I left for the south of France, I realized I’d lost a little bit of weight and needed to change my regime. I’ve done that and the last few days have been pretty special with the family here.

“We’ve eaten non-stop and it has been a great celebration.”

Other birthdays today include THE Regis Philbin, Gene Simmons, Elvis Costello, Tim Burton, and Billy Ray Cyrus.

In this episode:

• another physics experiment with the fake Julius Sumner Miller (nuclear fusion using lasers),
• Rob getting the complete series of Get a Life on DVD,
• Family Matters season one coming to DVD in June 2010,
• celebrity deaths (Corey Haim, Peter Graves, and Robert Culp),
• Jon Voight as Jim Phelps in Mission: Impossible (1996),
• Esteban and Billy Mitchell,
• more weird comments on our Steven Seagal Hall of Lame post,
• Nicolas Cage,
• the new 15-minute National Lampoon’s Vacation short film starring Chevy Chase and Beverly D’Angelo,
• Crash Course In Science performing “Cakes in the Home” on The Uncle Floyd Show circa 1980 (video),
• Seth MacFarlane’s Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy (Backstage with Bob Dylan),
• Unseen64′s screenshots and videos from the unreleased video game GoldenEye 007 Remake (Xbox Live Arcade),
• Hulk Hogan imitating “Macho Man” Randy Savage on TNA Wrestling,
• Greg talking to Jesse Ventura at Barnes and Noble in Clifton, NJ,
• Abraham Lincoln and John Lennon conspiracy theories,
• Predator vs. Dick Cheney,
• Eliza Dushku selling clothes and car tires on eBay,
• our review of Hot Tub Time Machine (2010) starring John Cusack and Craig Robinson,
• our review of On the Waterfront (1954) starring Marlon Brando and Eva Marie Saint,
• Marlon Brando’s filmography,
• the upcoming movie MacGruber (2010) starring Will Forte and Val Kilmer,
• the best movies from 1960-1989,
• and the exclusive new version of “We Are the World” featuring Michael Jackson, Larry King, Louie Anderson, Sean Connery, Stan Lee, Dr. Phil, Bill Cosby, Sylvester Stallone, “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Al Gore, Billy Connolly, Don Knots, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Tom Green, Gary Busey, Jeff Bridges, Hulk Hogan, Marlon Brando, and Steven Seagal.

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In this episode:

• celebrity deaths (John Hughes and Walter Cronkite),
• Nate and Hayes (1983) starring Tommy Lee Jones,
• Curb Your Enthusiasm returning to HBO on 9/20/09,
• celebrity death updates (Billy Mays and Michael Jackson),
• Steven Seagal on Twitter,
• James Rolfe’s video reports from Comic-Con on spiketv.com,
• the upcoming movie Stan Helsing (2009) starring Leslie Nielsen,
• our movie review of Funny People (2009) starring Adam Sandler and Seth Rogen,
• people fighting with each other in the theater,
• our movie review of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009) starring Channing Tatum and Sienna Miller,
• horrendous computer graphics and special effects,
• the Angry Video Game Nerd’s Konami Laserscope video,
• Sean Connery,
• the Baroness and Snake Eyes,
• the G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero theme song,
• “The Touch” by Stan Bush,
• DrSmoov’s funny Transformers videos,
• Frank Welker’s Megatron and Fred Jones voices,
• the Scooby-Doo movies starring Freddie Prinze Jr.,
• What Ever Happened To? (Rachael Leigh Cook),
• and wondering what listener Esteban in FL is up to.

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In this episode:

• special guest Dennis in CA,
• the upcoming movie Toy Story 3 (2010),
• the most recent episode of Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO,
• Republicans and evolution,
• Jesus and tall tales,
• watching Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984) at Sunshine Cinema in NYC (picture)
• various James Bond actors,
• Sean Connery,
• Dennis’s review of Watchmen (2009),
• the superhero movie fad,
• Superman,
• Paul McCartney and The Fireman,
• MC Hammer and Vanilla Ice (concert promo pic),
• old stupid styles (Z. Cavaricci, I.O.U., Hypercolor, and sweatpants with the legs pulled up),
• the upcoming movie X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009),
• the upcoming movie Thor (2011),
• Will Smith as Captain America,
• Jake “The Snake” Roberts trapping The Ultimate Warrior in a room full of snakes,
• the Metal Gear series of video games,
• The Fountain (2006) starring Hugh Jackman,
• The Prestige (2006) starring Christian Bale,
• and Dennis’s encounter with George Lucas at the Game Developers Conference in 2008.

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In this episode:

• another trip to the Digital Press video game store in Clifton, NJ (www.digitpress.com),
• meeting James Rolfe (the Angry Video Game Nerd) and trying to get him on the show,
• the Nostalgia Critic,
• celebrity deaths (Mel Ferrer, Bo Diddley, Harvey Korman, Jim McKay, Tim Russert, and George Carlin, thanks to www.deadoraliveinfo.com),
• What Ever Happened To? (Jim J. Bullock),
• a psycho in Union Square Park claiming NASA is going to blow up Jupiter on 7/7/08,
• Project Lucifer,
• a Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling update,
• Sean Connery’s memoirs,
• Kung Fu Panda (2008) starring Jack Black,
• You Don’t Mess with the Zohan (2008) starring Adam Sandler,
• Kevin Nealon’s horrible acting,
• Dana Carvey’s new HBO comedy special Squatting Monkeys Tell No Lies,
• Mike Myers,
• the upcoming movie Disaster Movie (2008),
• Frank Darabont’s Indiana Jones and the City of Gods script,
• the new Apple iPhone 3G and disposable gadgets,
• The Kid from Brooklyn on Last Comic Standing (www.thekidfrombrooklyn.com),
• Rob’s trip to California,
• Los Angeles vs. New York City,
• celebrity sightings (Lisa Bonet, Neil Patrick Harris, and Ryan Reynolds),
• and our listener Joe from Belleville, NJ.

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Our episode 100 improvised comedy extravaganza!

In this episode:

• Paunch in Time (Moses and the Ten Commandments),
• the dueling Dr. Phils’ new album,
• a skit about the Paunch bad luck (Who Wants to Be a Millionaire part two),
• Louie Anderson’s new hit single,
• another physics experiment with the fake Julius Sumner Miller (pressure),
• What Ever Happened To? (Gwyneth Paltrow),
• and The Paunch Stevenson Show Presidential debate on Larry King Live featuring Bill Maher, Sean Connery, Christopher Walken, Bill Cosby, Dr. Phil, “The Macho Man” Randy Savage, Jesse “The Body” Ventura, Gary Busey, Stan Lee, Louie Anderson, Billy Connolly, and Larry the Cable Guy.

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