In this episode:

• our giant movie review of Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) in 3D, starring Shia LaBeouf and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley,
• the ridiculous length of the movie,
• the end of the shaky camera fad,
• a list of movies and TV shows Michael Bay ripped off (The Transformers, Superman, The Watchmen, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, and Jackie Chan’s Who Am I?),
• illogical Duracell battery pricing at Staples,
• our roll call of robots in the movie (Optimus Prime, Bumblebee, Ironhide, Ratchet, Sentinal Prime, Starscream, Megatron, Shockwave, Soundwave, and dozens of unnamed robots),
• Sentinal Prime’s face modeled after Sean Connery,
• Bay’s horrendous computer animated version of John F. Kennedy,
• Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) constantly screaming and crying,
• Bay’s terrible Barack Obama impersonator,
• Sam spending an hour going on job interviews,
• Leonard Nimoy as the voice of Sentinal Prime and Galvatron,
• various plot holes,
• Optimus Prime actually wondering where his trailer went in the movie,
• robots who were killed in the movie (the unnamed Scottish Autobot, Ironhide, Megatron, Starscream, the unnamed Decepticon bird, etc.),
• our welcoming of the inevitable Transformers movie reboot,
• Transformers spitting,
• Michael Bay turning Optimus Prime into a ruthless murderer,
• Peter Cullen and Frank Welker’s voice acting,
• Shia LaBeouf’s recent acting career (Eagle Eye and Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps),
• Bay’s constant use of slow motion,
• billions of dollars worth of damage in action movies with no consequences,
• hacking into objects,
• Bay’s ignorance of science,
• the lack of rules and continuity in Bay’s Transformers movies,
• What Ever Happened To? (Bugle Boy jeans, Z. Cavaricci genie pants, Zubaz, IOU sweatshirts, B.U.M. Equipment, etc.),
• Roseanne Barr’s reality show Roseanne’s Nuts on Lifetime,
• a Transformers: Dark of the Moon cameo by Scott Krinsky from Chuck,
• Bay’s completely wasted use of 3D,
• fans feeling obligated to watch bad movies,
• Glynn Turman appearing in Super 8 (2011) and Gremlins (1984),
• Sean Connery’s brother Neil Connery starring in bad movies: OK Connery (1967) and The Body Stealers (1969),
• celebrity deaths (Peter Falk and Sherwood Schwartz),
• Paul Reiser and The Paunch Stevenson Show episode 2,
• and a new stupid style (extremely short cutoff shorts with dangling pockets).

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In this episode:

• getting Joe in KY and Kelly from www.wrestlecrap.com on the show,
• celebrity deaths (Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and David Carradine),
• Alan Alda and “Weird Al” Yankovic,
• Jeff Goldblum and Harrison Ford supposedly killing each other on a movie set in New Zealand,
• a guest celebrity death by Lauren Elder from the Broadway cast of Hair (Michael Jackson),
• Tiffani-Amber Thiessen refusing to participate in Jimmy Fallon’s Saved by the Bell reunion,
• our phone call with Michael Jackson from December 2005,
• Paul McCartney,
• celebrities we’ve recently met (Al Unser Jr., Janeane Garofalo, and Dan Aykroyd),
• An Evening with Kevin Smith at Carnegie Hall,
• the upcoming video game Wet featuring the voice of Eliza Dushku,
• our movie review of The Dark Knight (2008) starring Christian Bale and Heath Ledger,
• the Atari 5200 USB 128-in-1 flash multi-cart on www.atarimax.com,
• the Nintendo Entertainment System PowerPak flash cart www.retrousb.com,
• Jimmy Justice’s YouTube videos,
• Uncle Floyd Vivino running for governor of New Jersey,
• and our giant movie review of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) starring Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox.
• (here’s our giant review of Michael Bay’s first Transformers movie)

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90 minute MP3 file – 41.2 MB (right-click to save)

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Our big Star Trek (2009) review! (includes spoilers)

In this episode:

• big upcoming summer movies,
• Land of the Lost (2009) starring Will Ferrell,
• Year One (2009) starring Jack Black and Michael Cera,
• our movie review of Role Models (2008) starring Paul Rudd,
• G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009) starring Dennis Quaid,
• Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) starring Shia LaBeouf,
• our movie review of Star Trek (2009) starring Chris Pine,
• Greg’s veteran fan perspective and Rob’s newbie perspective,
• Frank from The Overnightscape and his Twitter posts about Star Trek,
• canon vs. reboot,
• Zachary Quinto as Spock,
• the rest of the cast (Chris Pine, Simon Pegg, Leonard Nimoy, Eric Bana, etc.),
• the annoying shaky camera technique,
• ways J.J. Abrams could’ve included William Shatner in the movie,
• Captain Pike’s wheelchair,
• Star Trek vs. the Star Wars prequels,
• rescuing Romulans,
• Nicholas Cage’s car crash,
• and forgetting the movie Cloverfield (2008).

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65 minute MP3 file – 29.8 MB (right-click to save)

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In this episode:

• our review of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008),
• its rewatchability,
• Harrison Ford’s age,
• Karen Allen,
• ridiculously picky fans,
• the use of computer graphics and humor,
• the alien at the end,
• the 1950s setting,
• Shia LaBeouf swinging from vines,
• women waiting in line to see Sex and the City (2008),
• the Star Wars prequels,
• directors reediting their movies,
• Hayden Christensen’s horrible acting,
• ideas for the next Indiana Jones movie,
• the upcoming movies Death Wish (2009) and Rambo V (2009) both starring Sylvester Stallone,
• wondering what Scott C. Clements thinks about Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull,
• Lauren’s review,
• summer movies she’s looking forward to (Sex and the City, You Don’t Mess with the Zohan, Tropic Thunder, The Dark Knight, Step Brothers, Hamlet 2, etc.),
• Charlotte Rae,
• and What Ever Happened To? (Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze, Jr.).

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39 minute MP3 file – 17.9 MB (right-click to save)

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The Paunch Stevenson Show super mega movie review of Transformers!

In this episode:

• our Transformers (2007) movie review with Adam in SC,
• the Transformers’ lack of dialogue and personality,
• shaky camera work during battles,
• lengthy transformations,
• Hugo Weaving’s lame Megatron voice,
• Peter Cullen as the voice of Optimus Prime,
• Darius McCrary as the voice of Jazz,
• the Allspark cube,
• eBay,
• the World Wide Web and Al Gore,
• Jon Voight’s pronunciation of “robot,”
• a list of movies that Transformers (2007) ripped off (They Live, Small Soldiers, Superman, AVP: Alien vs. Predator, Independence Day, Gremlins 2: The New Batch, etc.),
• the lack of machines in the 1930s,
• Kremzeek,
• the lack of the Transformers’ backstory,
• the trailer for the upcoming untitled J.J. Abrams movie (2008),
• season two of Who Wants to Be a Superhero? starring Stan Lee,
• our movie review of Live Free or Die Hard (2007) starring Bruce Willis and Justin Long,
• Herbie the Love Bug,
• the Transformers peeing and playing hide and seek,
• impressive fan CGI,
• and a line from The Transformers: The Movie (1986).

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41 minute MP3 file – 18.8 MB (right-click to save)

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