Microsoft Xbox One

xbox_one The Paunch Stevenson Show Lame Idiot of The Year Award

The design, marketing, public relations, and executive team for the newly released Microsoft Xbox One console are the winner of The Paunch Stevenson Show Lame Idiot of 2013 Award. Granted the system has already sold quite well, but Microsoft went from being the dominant seventh generation system (everywhere but Japan) to Sony’s doormat.

Why did this happen? First there’s the price, debuting at $499, a full $100 more than the Playstation 4. That was thanks to the Kinect device, which all consumers are forced to buy whether they want it or not. Second issue was maybe the most vocal among hardcore gamers: DRM. DRM is digital rights management, and basically means that even though you physically own a game, you kind of don’t! The initial plan was that you buy a game, install it to the hard drive, but then couldn’t bring it to a friend’s house, trade it into a game store, etc., without severe restrictions. Despite highly negative reactions to rumors about this, Microsoft refused to discuss it and after the details were announced, refused to dump the policy for many months.

Hardware wise, the system (like PS4) comes with a 500 GB hard drive. However, unlike PS4, nobody has any idea how you can replace or upgrade the drive in an XBox One. Brilliant. Additional ambiguity is the need to have the system connected to the internet to function, something that isn’t possible for all users everywhere in the world. In one instance, an Xbox executive caustically admonished American military troops overseas for complaining that they couldn’t keep a system online like that in the middle of the desert. The executive told them “to shut up and keep playing the Xbox 360.” Not to mention certain privacy concerns.

Lastly, there’s the highly confusing name, Xbox One, which is what most of us have been calling the first Xbox released in 2001. Now Microsoft has relented on certain issues like DRM, and their mistreatment/draconian policies for Indie-game developers. But the damage was done. Lame!!!!!!!!

Episode 191

The Paunch Stevenson Show episode 191

In this episode:

  • celebrity deaths (Gary Carter, Jan Berenstain, and Davy Jones),
  • the Berenstain Bears, Paddington the Bear, and the Lollipop Dragon,
  • Jason Malachi (the fake Michael Jackson) singing on Jackson’s 2010 album Michael,
  • Jaleel White competing on Dancing With The Stars season 14,
  • the fantastic chemistry between Jaleel White and Reginald VelJohnson on the TV show Family Matters,
  • @spacemandavid‘s Paunch marathons,
  • friend of the show Jack Silbert (@JackSilbert),
  • Mr. Bruno’s Pizzeria in Lyndhurst, NJ,
  • the original Star Wars trilogy in 3D not coming until 2015,
  • Michael Bay now re-imagining/ruining the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,
  • and the next generation Xbox: no optical drive?

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45 minute MP3 file – 20.9 MB (right-click to save)

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Episode 169

The Paunch Stevenson Show episode 169

In this episode:

  • Rob’s upgrade to Windows 7,
  • April Fools’ Day gag involving the Bio Force Ape prototype NES game,
  • homebrew Bio Force Ape programmer foiled,
  • Sega developed the Microsoft Xbox?,
  • the video game prototype scene,
  • the Angry Video Game Nerd’s future,
  • movies that kill franchises (The Jerky Boys: The Movie, Big Top Pee-wee, etc.),
  • Pee-wee Herman on Saturday Night Live (video),
  • the upcoming third Bill and Ted movie starring Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter,
  • Nicolas Cage arrested in New Orleans while busting into houses and screaming in the street,
  • the upcoming cartoon series The Governator starring Arnold Schwarzenegger,
  • the Fake Stan Lee meets the Real Stan Lee,
  • and Ted Danson’s lack of podium microphone skills.

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61.5 minute MP3 file – 28.1 MB (right-click to save)

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Episode 150

The Paunch Stevenson Show episode 150

In this episode:

  • another physics experiment with the fake Julius Sumner Miller (nuclear fusion using lasers),
  • Rob getting the complete series of Get a Life on DVD,
  • Family Matters season one coming to DVD in June 2010,
  • celebrity deaths (Corey Haim, Peter Graves, and Robert Culp),
  • Jon Voight as Jim Phelps in Mission: Impossible (1996),
  • Esteban and Billy Mitchell,
  • more weird comments on our Steven Seagal Hall of Lame post,
  • Nicolas Cage,
  • the new 15-minute National Lampoon’s Vacation short film starring Chevy Chase and Beverly D’Angelo,
  • Crash Course In Science performing “Cakes in the Home” on The Uncle Floyd Show circa 1980 (video),
  • Seth MacFarlane’s Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy (Backstage with Bob Dylan),
  • Unseen64’s screenshots and videos from the unreleased video game GoldenEye 007 Remake (Xbox Live Arcade),
  • Hulk Hogan imitating “Macho Man” Randy Savage on TNA Wrestling,
  • Greg talking to Jesse Ventura at Barnes and Noble in Clifton, NJ,
  • Abraham Lincoln and John Lennon conspiracy theories,
  • Predator vs. Dick Cheney,
  • Eliza Dushku selling clothes and car tires on eBay,
  • our review of Hot Tub Time Machine (2010) starring John Cusack and Craig Robinson,
  • our review of On the Waterfront (1954) starring Marlon Brando and Eva Marie Saint,
  • Marlon Brando’s filmography,
  • the upcoming movie MacGruber (2010) starring Will Forte and Val Kilmer,
  • the best movies from 1960-1989,
  • and the exclusive new version of “We Are the World” featuring Michael Jackson, Larry King, Louie Anderson, Sean Connery, Stan Lee, Dr. Phil, Bill Cosby, Sylvester Stallone, “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Al Gore, Billy Connolly, Don Knots, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Tom Green, Gary Busey, Jeff Bridges, Hulk Hogan, Marlon Brando, and Steven Seagal.

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85 minute MP3 file – 38.9 MB (right-click to save)

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Episode 55: Monday, December 11, 2006

The Paunch Stevenson Show episode 055

In this episode:

  • professional video gamers and Major League Gaming (www.mlgpro.com),
  • Burger King video games for Microsoft Xbox,
  • Sony PlayStation 3 launch day scams,
  • Nintendo Wii bundles,
  • bleem!,
  • the hypocrisy of Apple fanatics installing Microsoft Windows on their new Macintosh computers,
  • elevator common sense,
  • the Power Glove by Mattel and other useless gimmick toys,
  • Tyco slot cars,
  • and Tom Cruise’s auto racing career.

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24 minute MP3 file – 11 MB (right-click to save)

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